I'm walking with my eyes closed

I'm walking with my eyes closed
Past railways and bridges
In a city that I'm supposed to love.
I feel blind and detached
And I can hear Joni Mitchell
Singing a survival song.

I'm not grateful to you or anybody.
I could die, or fly away.
I can't even remember your face
Or the way you said goodbye.
But deep in my mind
Where daylight is never found
Is a warmth, a glowing coal
Or a setting sun
Where my spirit will run
Together with someone.

I guess I don't want to see you again,
But I feel the decision's not mine.
With you I felt like a tiger
But the paper's discoloured with time.
When I think of the times we had
The places we saw and walked through,
I can only see them as a movie
Seen on some TV in a lonely room.

I guess I don't want to hear your voice again.
It echoes like in some deep cave.
It's a noise that reminds me of rainfall.
I've cried more that grey skies ever gave.
When I think of the people I've hung out with,
You're just another down the line.
Your feelings were something I cared for
But I can't go on disregarding mine.

Manchester, early 1988 - to RH